Brothers and sisters, friends and family, happy Tuesday and, aloha!
Light and darkness. Pleasure and pain. Zeros and ones. Yin and yang. Muscles and bones. Land and sea. Good and evil. Now and eternity.
The prophet Alma in the Book of Mormon taught, “All things denote there is a God.” [1] To believe that is to see everything. To see that there is duality in everything. A universal balance of forces. Complementary, constructive powers that must be equal in strength if they are to bring balance and harmony. The prophet Lehi teaches his son Jacob that “opposition in all things” [2] is a necessary part of God’s plan, allowing us to exercise agency and experience righteousness and/or wickedness, joy and/or misery, things to act and things to be acted upon [3]. Elder David A. Bednar shared, “As sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father, we have been blessed with the gift of moral agency, the capacity for independent action and choice. Endowed with agency, you and I are agents, and we primarily are to act and not just be acted upon.” [4]
Having the capacity to act and the agency to choose for ourselves is all part of God’s grand plan.
As I have contemplated the duality of many life experiences and the purposes of opposites and opposition, I have wondered about the purpose and what is to be learned.
What if this opposition in all things was really just strength in all things? A duality of forces to make us better. Forces created to be complementary and constructive when balanced. This opposition isn’t bad. In the brain, we have two types of matter: white matter and grey matter. One brain with two very different types of tissues performing complementary, constructive functions that allow us to think and feel and move. You wouldn’t want just one or the other. You want both. I have a daughter that studies the brain and I love listening to her as she expands her research and tells us everything that we need to know to be healthier, wealthier, and wiser. She’s amazing.
Think with me for a minute about a duality you’re in the middle of right now - the duality of academic and spiritual growth.
As a student at BYU–Hawaii, you may feel the pull between your rigorous academic schedule and your spiritual commitments.
- The Academic Force: This requires discipline, critical thinking, and intellectual stretching to prepare you to lead in your chosen fields.
- The Spiritual Force: This requires humility, prayer, time at church, both hours and in the temple to deepen your discipleship.
- The Balanced Strength: These are not competing interests; they are complementary, constructive powers. Your education allows you to better serve in the Kingdom, while your spiritual life provides the resilience needed to succeed in your studies, in your chosen fields.
You might be feeling overwhelmed by this duality and unsure how you’re going to manage all that is required of you right now.
Let me read to you what Elder Ronald A. Rasband shared from this same pulpit almost exactly one year ago. He said, “If a young and busy college student were to come to me and ask for advice about his or her studies, my answer would be simple: ‘Give the Lord equal time.’ You might be thinking right now, “I just do not have time, Elder Rasband. I am already overcommitted. I have to get good grades here at BYU–Hawaii. I am taking too many credit hours already. I have tough professors who expect my full attention. I am working at the PCC. I can barely get to Church on Sunday.”
He continued, “Sound familiar to any of you today? Well, know this: you cannot put your testimony on the shelf during your college years. Give the Lord equal time in your university experience, then give Him equal time the rest of your life as you go back to all the countries that you are here in Hawaii representing.”
He then made each of us a promise, “As you give the Lord equal time as you pursue your higher education, the Spirit will enhance your academic pursuits. You will find you have extra time and capacity for your courses, and doors will be opened for you that might have otherwise been closed.” [5]
Another duality we experience is in our families. The Family Proclamation teaches, “All human beings—male and female—are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and destiny.” [6]
“By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners.” [7]
Elder Rasband expanded our understanding of this teaching when he shared at general conference in October, “Preside does not mean dominate, and nurture does not mean a secondary role. God has given men and women different but equal and essential roles that complement each other.
“We find in the family proclamation: 'Fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners.'
“Equal is a word that matters. Over the years, as Sister Rasband and I have worked together in what the proclamation describes as our “sacred responsibilities,” we have shaped an equally yoked marriage. As each of our children is now married, Sister Rasband and I have continued to counsel them and their spouses on how to be equal partners.” [8]
If you’re still dating and in your quest for your “other half”, let’s make sure you’re looking for your complementary, constructive, balancing force. President Russell M. Nelson once stated, “Ordinary and imperfect people can build each other through their wholeness together. The complete contribution of one partner to the other is essential to exaltation”. [9]
In the Old Testament, we learn about the first parents on earth, Adam and Eve, and the nature of God.
First, let’s talk a little about the nature of God. The word that was used for the name of God is “Elohim”. In Hebrew, when they wanted to say just one God, it would be El or Eloah, but Elohim is a plural word. [10] The world Elohim has a rich etymological layering.
In Genesis 1:26-27, we learn about the physical creation of Adam and Eve.
Verse 26, “And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness:…” [11] Verse 27 reads, “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.” [12]
The doctrine of a Heavenly Mother is a cherished and distinctive belief among Latter-day Saints. [13] President Dallin H. Oaks has said, “Our theology begins with heavenly parents.” [14]
Two beings united by one law. The duality of where we came from, a father and a mother. A duality that symbolizes equality. Complementary constructive forces with one purpose. Not pushing against each other, but balanced and building together.
We study accounts of the Creation not only in the Old Testament but also in the Pearl of Great Price, adding to our understanding of both God and our first parents. It’s beautiful to read the account in its original Hebrew text. Our understanding increases when we can read without translation. Have you ever found yourself lost in translation, asking yourself what the author was truly meaning to say? What was the exact word choice?
Moses tells us about the creation of the world, and there we see this duality beginning to take shape. Complementary, constructive forces of light and darkness, separating the waters and then forming dry land. Followed by stars and planets, animals in and out of the water, and then, from the dust, Adam. He was tasked with naming everything. [15] Can you imagine the joy of meeting koalas and dolphins, naming eagles and zebra fish, but eventually the sorrow of realizing you are the only one of your kind? The only human. You know all other animals in the sea and on land, but no matter where you look, everything has a mate, a complementary opposite, except you. This was not good.
You’ll remember the next part. God takes a rib from Adam and forms Eve, saying, in Genesis 2:18, “I will make him an help meet for him.” [16] But remember, the original text was in Hebrew, so what did Moses originally write for help meet? He used the words “ezer kenegdo”. Ezer means “help”, but not in a servant or submissive way. There is also a footnote in the LDS edition of the King James translation of the Bible for the use of the word help that expands our understanding. It reads, “helper suited to, worthy of, or corresponding to him.” [17]
Help wasn’t a common word in the Old Testament. You’d think there would be many times the prophets would tell us to help someone else, but this isn’t the meaning of ezer. The majority of the translations of ezer mean strength or salvation or protector and they’re referring to Christ as the one who “helps” or rescues us. The other word in help meet was kenegdo. This one is tough. Genesis is the only time that word was used in the bible. In the book Forgotten Women of God, Diana Webb explains, “neged”, a related word which means “against.” I thought it was very strange that God would create a companion for Adam that was “against” him! Later, I learned that kenegdo could also mean “in front of” or “opposite”. This still didn’t help that much. Finally, I heard it explained as being “exactly corresponding to” like when you look at yourself in the mirror.” [18]
Think of your two hands. They are mirror opposites. The same but not identical. One might be good at writing and fine motor skills, while the other might have better grip strength and can carry heavier loads. You might be good at strumming guitar strings, but you need the other hand to make the chords.
This gives us so much more depth and understanding of who Eve is to Adam. She is his equal in intelligence, power, dominion, and righteousness.
Sisters, I pray you desire to be with your spiritual equal. A man who will love and protect you as you nurture your family. I hope you desire a partner who sees and treats you as his ezer kenegdo, just as Adam did with Eve.
Brothers, I pray you desire to be with your spiritual equal, as well. A partner who will support you in your duties to preside, protect, and provide.
Adam was created in the image and likeness of our Heavenly Father, and Eve in the image and likeness of our Heavenly Mother. President Spencer W. Kimball taught, “God made man in his own image and certainly he made woman in the image of his wife-partner” and “You [women] are daughters of God. You are precious. You are made in the image of our Heavenly Mother.” [19]
In Moses, we learn that Adam and Eve understood not to partake of the fruit from the tree of knowledge of good and evil or the tree of life.
When Satan comes to Eve to convince her to eat the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil he shows up as a snake; we don't know if this was physically, metaphorically, or symbolically. [20] During Moses' time, a snake was symbolic of Christ. [21] So, Satan showing up as and presenting himself as a divine being with divine authority is a form of beguiling, a form of trickery, of deceit. Satan always aims to deceive.
In the garden, they could not die. Once they partook of the fruit, they were physically changed. They became mortal.
“Most Christian churches teach that the Fall was a tragedy, that if Adam and Eve had not partaken of the forbidden fruit, they and all their posterity could now be living in immortal bliss in the Garden of Eden. But truth revealed to latter-day prophets teaches that the Fall was not a tragedy—without it, Adam and Eve would have had no posterity. Thus, the Fall was a necessary step in Heavenly Father’s plan to bring about the eternal happiness of His children.” [22]
Partaking of the fruit brought mortality, with its many opportunities to choose between good and evil, and enabled Adam and Eve to have children. Thus, the Fall opened the door for Heavenly Father’s children to come into the world, obtain physical bodies, and participate in “the great plan of happiness”. [23]
Last week in Come Follow Me, we read, “When you read about the Fall of Adam and Eve, focus not on the seeming tragedy but on the possibilities—not on the paradise Adam and Eve lost but on the glory their choice allows us to receive.” [24]
President Emily Belle Freeman taught, “Eve made the choice to come to mortality, to leave the presence of God for a time, to learn wisdom, to become. She was a daughter who was called and chosen to fulfill an important role in God’s plan… In the eyes of the Lord, Eve was valued.” [25]
Eve was foreordained to be “the mother of all living”. [26] It’s inspiring to imagine her among other valiant women. Formed, or built, as the original Hebrew word denotes, from Adam’s rib might symbolize equality, side-by-side, and may also underscore her role as an ezer, or protector. We have 24 ribs, 12 on each side. They surround and protect the vital organs in the chest, such as the heart and lungs. They’re also flexible enough to expand and contract with each breath, when we laugh, or when we get the hiccups, you got to have both.
President Russell M. Nelson said about Eve’s creation, “All the purpose of the world and all that was in the world would be brought to naught without woman—a keystone in the priesthood arch of creation.” [27]
It was only after her creation that God rested for a season.
We learn that the power Adam has is equally important. We know worthy men, ordained to priesthood offices, carry the power to act in the name of God and bless the lives of His children. Men have the power given to them to perform ordinances. They direct the affairs of the church and administer the ordinances and covenants of the priesthood. They lead and preside.
I shared before, but I’m going to read it again. Elder Rasband has taught, “Fathers are to preside … in love and righteousness,” and “mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children.” Preside does not mean dominate, and nurture does not mean a secondary role. God has given men and women different but equal and essential roles that complement each other.” [28]
When we look at the true order of God and the true powers of our heavenly parents, their examples are perfect. Women bring the spirit children of our heavenly parents through the veil, and men provide the means for those spirits to return to our heavenly parents. The tree of life is symbolic of eternal life. The gift given to those who have chosen to perform the ordinances and make the covenants necessary to live forever with God. This second tree is also a vital step in our plan of salvation.
We have equality as recipients of God’s perfected love for each of us. The late Elder John A. Widtsoe wrote: “The place of woman in the Church is to walk beside the man, not in front of him nor behind him. In the Church there is full equality between man and woman.” [29]
Within those great assurances, however, our roles and assignments differ. These are eternal differences—with women being given many tremendous responsibilities of motherhood and sisterhood and men being given the tremendous responsibilities of fatherhood and the priesthood—but the man is not without the woman nor the woman without the man in the Lord. [30] Both a righteous man and a righteous woman are a blessing to all those their lives touch.
The Family Proclamation teaches, “The first commandment that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife.”
The Family Proclamation continues, “We declare that God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force. We further declare that God has commanded that the sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife.” [31]
The daughters of Eve have the sacred responsibility of bringing spirits through the veil.
The act of childbirth is sacred. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland taught that the power to create new life gives women “the power and the chemistry and the eternally transmitted seeds of life to grant someone else her second estate, someone else his next level of development in the divine plan of salvation.” [32]
As we look toward the eternities, we don't know if the organization of the church will be the same in heaven as it is today. Will we have wards or branches, stakes or zones? We only know that families will be there, and the family is central to the Creator's plan of happiness. It's all about families.
President Dallin H. Oaks recently said, “The Church of Jesus Christ is sometimes known as a family-centered church. It is! Our relationship to God and the purpose of our mortal life are explained in terms of the family. The gospel of Jesus Christ is the plan of our Heavenly Father for the benefit of His spirit children. We can truly say that the gospel plan was first taught to us in the council of an eternal family, it is implemented through our mortal families, and its intended destiny is to exalt the children of God in eternal families.” [33]
We continue in The Family Proclamation, “Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities.” [34] Children may not remember what your job title is, but they might better remember meaningful family traditions, silly game nights, fun cooking experiments, and all the Saturdays doing chores and cleaning the house.
Allow me to introduce my complementary, constructive, balancing force, Jeff. I love dressing up in over-the-top costumes for Halloween every year, while most years he goes as “supportive husband happy to hand out candy while wife dances around in upside down inflatable clown costume”. This year I did get him to wear a couple’s costume. We were a crab. We had to hold hands inside the costume to make sure we walked in step together. I loved it, and he was a good sport. He is a cruise ship, I am a speed boat. He holds the string to my kite so that I can fly.
That's another example of this duality. These complementary strengths, when balanced, bring harmony.
In the dynamics and the organization of a family, husbands and wives are equal in the sight of God. Together they form a family order. President Ezra Taft Benson taught, “The order of priesthood spoken of in the scriptures is sometimes referred to as the patriarchal order because it came down from father to son. But this order is otherwise described in modern revelation as an order of family government where a man and woman enter into a covenant with God – just as did Adam and Eve – to be sealed for eternity, to have posterity, and to do the will and work of God throughout their mortality.” [35]
Husbands and wives have complementary powers like two hands; they're equal but not identical. As Elder David A. Bednar has said, “The most sacred of all our divine powers is to become a co-creator with Heavenly Father in providing physical bodies for His spirit sons and daughters and in establishing a righteous and Christ-centered family.” They cleave unto each other and become one in purpose. [36]
The first duality, men and women, mothers and fathers, they are equal, not identical. Together, they work to fulfill one purpose: To bring souls to Christ that all may have eternal life.
As you go through the coming days and weeks, I invite you to actively seek, recognize, acknowledge, and give gratitude for duality or the opposition in all things. Look at your environment. Look at your choices. Look for the duality. Look for the complementary, seemingly opposing forces. Be grateful for both. They are equally needed. When they're out of balance, we aren't thriving. When they're in balance, we grow. We become stronger, and remember, “All things denote there is a God.” [37]
I say this in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Notes:
[1] Alma 30:44
[2] 2 Nephi 2:11
[3] 2 Nephi 2:13-14
[4] David A. Bednar, “And Nothing Shall Offend Them,” Ensign or Liahona, October 2006, 90
[5] Ronald A. Rasband, “Give the Lord Equal Time”, [Brigham Young University–Hawaii devotional, January 28, 2025], speeches.byuh.edu]
[6] “The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” Gospel Library
[7] “The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” Gospel Library
[8] Ronald A. Rasband, “The Family Proclamation—Words from God,” Ensign or Liahona, October 2025
[9] Russell M. Nelson, “Lessons from Eve,” Ensign, October 1987, 87
[10] Bible Dictionary, “El”
[11] Genesis 1:26
[12] Genesis 1:27
[13] Church History Topics, “Mother in Heaven”, Gospel Library
[14] Dallin H. Oaks, “Apostacy and Restoration,” Ensign, April 1995, 87
[15] Genesis 2:19-20
[16] Genesis 2:18
[17] Genesis 2:18, footnote b
[18] Diana Webb, Forgotten Women of God: Whom the Men Left Out of the Bible [Salt Lake City: Bonneville, 2010]
[19] Spencer W. Kimball, The Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, [1982] 25
[20] Moses 4:5-7
[21] Numbers 21:4-9
[22] “The Fulness of the Gospel: The Fall of Adam and Eve,” Ensign, June 2006
[23] Alma 42:8
[24] Come, Follow Me—For Home and Church: Old Testament 2026
[25] Emily Belle Freeman, “Finding Your Worth through Jesus Christ” [2024 BYU Women’s Conference], Gospel Library
[26] Moses 4:26
[27] Russell M. Nelson, “Lessons from Eve,” Ensign, October 1987, 87
[28] Ronald A. Rasband, “The Family Proclamation—Words from God,” Ensign or Liahona, October 2025
[29] John A. Widtsoe, “Improvement Era,” March 1942, 161
[30] 1 Corinthians 11:11
[31] “The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” Gospel Library
[32] Jeffrey R. Holland, “Of Souls, Symbols, and Sacraments” [Brigham Young University devotional, January 12, 1988] speeches.byu.edu
[33] Dallin H. Oaks, “The Family-Centered Gospel of Jesus Christ,” Ensign or Liahona, October 2025
[34] “The Family: A Proclamation to the World,” Gospel Library
[35] Teachings of the Presidents of the Church: Ezra Taft Benson [2014], 171
[36] David A. Bednar, “Ye Are the Temple of God,” Ensign, September 2001
[37] Alma 30:44