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Devotionals

How Do You Know...?

Brothers and Sisters, Aloha,

I want to first say mahalo to Gailyn for my introduction. I appreciate her friendship and support, in addition to the many experiences we have shared through the years. Words cannot express what an absolute blessing you are to my life. I am also thankful for this opportunity to be here in front of you today.

When I received the invitation to speak, I had just arrived with my husband and kids in Colorado. We traveled there to visit family, and the first place we were headed was to my missionary’s home in Castle Rock. I told her about the invitation, and she immediately asked me, “so you’re going to do it, right?” I chuckled and half-jokingly said, “Of course,” with a very cynical nod. The real thoughts going through my head were a whirlwind of nervousness and doubt. Who was I to stand on this podium and share my thoughts? I can’t even come close to the great leaders and speakers who have stood here with their divine council before me or will in the future.

In her wisdom, and probably from the look on my face, she nearly immediately shot back… “You know who you are, that’s all that matters.”

Did I? And was it?

I met Allie almost exactly 22 years ago, shortly before I turned 18 years old. I had just graduated from Kahuku High School, and she was serving at the Laie Temple Visitors’ Center. Her testimony and love of the gospel was contagious, and it still is today. Since then, she has changed roles from the missionary who guided me to baptism, to a big sister who has seen the highest and lowest parts of my adult life. Her simple statement resonated deeply within me. She captured a truth I had forgotten amidst self-doubt and uncertainty.

At home I am a spouse and a parent. Here at BYU–Hawaii, some could call me a colleague; students might call me their supervisor, maybe even sometimes a mentor. In other settings I am a friend or an acquaintance. All these titles, and more, challenge me to grow and evolve each day. And yet, amidst the labels, there is one that holds the deepest and most unwavering truth: I am a child of God. We are children of God.

How do you know?

  
Have you ever found yourself searching and possibly yearning for a clearer roadmap in the journey we call life? I have. Asking yourself questions like…
How do I know if I’m where I need to be?
How do I know if I’m spending my time on the right priorities?
How do I know if the path I’m taking is the right path for me?
How do I know if what I’m doing is God’s will or is He trying to tell me something else?
How do I know I am enough for the task ahead?

These questions or others like them can weigh heavily on the mind, especially in moments of doubt or transition. However, within the complexities of life, there is solace in knowing that we are not alone in our quest for answers. While there may not always be a clear roadmap laid out before us, there are guiding Gospel principles that can illuminate our path and bring clarity to our direction. Starting with knowing who you are, and then in the quiet moments of prayer and reflection, we can discern the whispers of divine guidance. Enduring to the end brings the assurance that each step, however uncertain, leads us closer to understanding our purpose and fulfilling our true divine potential.

It's natural to feel overwhelmed, anxious, or even lost at times. You might be grappling with the pressure to excel academically while also trying to maintain some semblance of a social life. Perhaps you're worried about your future career prospects or struggling to find your place in a world that feels increasingly chaotic and divided. Financial worries, mental health or relationship struggles, you name it, whatever your concerns may be, know that you're not alone.

One of my favorite scriptures isn’t necessarily found in the scriptures itself – it comes from the Bible Dictionary on prayer. It reads “As soon as we learn the true relationship in which we stand toward God (namely, God is our Father, and we are his children), then at once prayer becomes natural and instinctive on our part. […] Prayer is the act by which the will of the Father and the will of the child are brought into correspondence with each other. The object of prayer is not to change the will of God, but to secure for ourselves and for others the blessings that God is already willing to grant, but that are made conditional on our asking for them. Blessings require some work or effort on our part before we can obtain them. Prayer is a form of work and is an appointed means for obtaining the highest of all blessings.” [1]

Adding to that, Elder Holland said in his recent general conference talk, “Ultimately, we can look to the example of the Savior, who prayed so very, very often. But it has always been intriguing to me that Jesus felt the need to pray at all. Wasn’t He perfect? About what did He need to pray? Well, I have come to realize that He too, with us, wanted to ‘seek [the Father’s] face, believe his word, and trust his grace.’ Time after time, He retreated from society to be alone before piercing heaven with His prayers. At other times, He prayed in the company of a few companions. Then He would seek heaven on behalf of multitudes who would cover a hillside. Sometimes prayer glorified His clothing. Sometimes it glorified His countenance. Sometimes He stood to pray, sometimes He knelt, and at least once He fell on His face in prayer.” [2]

Maybe some of you have experienced those moments when prayers for answers or help seem to soar in from the heavens with clarity, guiding you precisely along your journey. Yet, there are times, probably more often than not, when we have prayers that seem to elude us, perhaps even feel like every possible roadblock is put in front of us as we try to keep moving forward. In those moments, it's tempting to falter, to question the efficacy of our prayers. But therein lies the essence of faith — not in the certainty of immediate answers, but in the unwavering trust that our petitions are heard, our pleas are received. Because then, prayer can become our steadfast companion, a place for relief, and a beacon of hope in the darkest of nights. As it says in the Bible Dictionary, it's a form of spiritual labor, an act of surrender and resilience, forging that bond between our mortal existence and eternal grace. Prayer emerges as our connection to the divine. It binds our hearts to the infinite love and wisdom of our Father in Heaven. As we recognize our relationship with God—He as our Father and we as His children—prayer ceases to be a mere ritual but becomes a conversation. Even the Savior, in His perfection, sought solace in prayer. His example directs the path for us, revealing that prayer isn't just a supplication for divine intervention but a witness of our enduring faith.

Through sincerity and continued practice, we open ourselves to commune with our Heavenly Father, pouring out our appreciation, hopes, fears, and even desires before Him. In the quiet moments of contemplation that follow, we allow His Spirit to speak to our hearts, guiding us along the path of righteousness and truth, because prayer isn't just about talking; it's also about listening. In the quiet moments of pondering and reflection, we open our hearts and minds to the promptings of the Spirit. Ultimately, I have also learned the journey of life is as much about the questions we ask as it is about the answers we discover.

In sacrament a few weeks ago, my daughter was doing some coloring to keep herself busy. The words on the paper read “Grow through what you go through.” I think about those words and the deep meaning they have. We all face periods in our lives where we need to grow—some of it from good, some of it from bad, some of it easy, and some of it hard. The key basis is growing in it, progressing. I am sure if I was able to sit down with each of you here, or listening, I know you would have a story or experience that defines this. I have been humbled by getting to know students through my years here at BYUHawaii and listening to your personal experiences and challenges. So many of you have inspired me by the circumstances you have been given, or are in, but are continuing to grow through. I met a student recently, I will call Alison, who is allowing me to share her story of faith in doubt and uncertainty with you. This was a time in her life that she believes without feeling Heavenly Father’s guiding wisdom, she might have given up, fallen totally into depression, or even strayed from the Church.

She says, “Several years ago, my husband and I were thrilled to find out that our family was expanding. However, just a few days after receiving the joyful news, we experienced the heartbreak of a miscarriage. The grief and sorrow we felt was overwhelming, but we were determined to hold on to our faith and hope that one day, we would become earthly parents. As the years went by, the wait became increasingly difficult. Yet, during this struggle, we chose to find joy in the blessings we did have. We focused on loving and serving each other, our family, and magnified our callings. We embraced the moments of happiness that came our way, no matter how small, and found comfort in our faith.

Then in 2022, at no fault of our own, we faced what I consider one of the hardest trials of our lives. Without too much detail, it was a time of great uncertainty and difficulty, there were many times I sought solace in the temple hoping for a miracle or answers to our prayers. One night, as I was attending a session, the phrase ‘there is hope’ came into my mind. Shortly after that night, we received unexpected news: I was pregnant. After enduring the pain of infertility for many years, this should have been a moment of pure joy. Instead, I found myself questioning the timing. We were still dealing with other significant challenges, and I wondered, "Why now? Couldn't this wait until we have first solved our other problems?" I struggled to see this as the answer we had been praying for.

But then, I realized that this child was the eternal hope and destination that God wanted us to hold on to. This was not the answer we wanted to receive but God knew we needed. Although I did not understand why or how this fit into His plan, I chose to trust in Him.”

While I very much understand that not all of us here may be in the same circumstance, relationship status, or have challenges as Alison, her story speaks to the universal human experience of struggling with faith in the face of despair. It's a testament to the strength of the spirit and the power of hope. It's a message of listening, trust, perseverance, and ultimately, the power of enduring. Her willingness, like many of you, to listen to the Spirit and lean into her faith, even when faced with doubts and questions, is admirable. It shows that faith isn't about having all the answers but rather about trusting in something greater than oneself. The answers we receive may not be what we expected or wanted, but they can still be part of a greater plan beyond our understanding.

One of my favorite prophets (I don’t know if we are allowed to have those?), President Thomas S. Monson said, “Our Heavenly Father, who gives us so much to delight in, also knows that we learn and grow and become stronger as we face and survive the trials through which we must pass. We know that there are times when we will experience heartbreaking sorrow, when we will grieve, and when we may be tested to our limits. However, such difficulties allow us to change for the better, to rebuild our lives in the way our Heavenly Father teaches us, and to become something different from what we were—better than we were, more understanding than we were, more empathetic than we were, with stronger testimonies than we had before.

This should be our purpose—to persevere and endure, yes, but also to become more spiritually refined as we make our way through sunshine and sorrow. Were it not for challenges to overcome and problems to solve, we would remain much as we are, with little or no progress toward our goal of eternal life. The poet expressed much the same thought in these words:
Good timber does not grow with ease,
The stronger wind, the stronger trees.
The further sky, the greater length.
The more the storm, the more the strength.
By sun and cold, by rain and snow,
In trees and men good timbers grow.” [3]

Life will inevitably bring us challenges and unexpected events. In those moments of adversity, it can be difficult to see the purpose behind our trials, and we may question why such burdens have been placed upon our shoulders. Yet, it is often through our struggles that we experience the most profound growth and develop an unwavering faith. Just as a seed must endure the darkness and pressure of the soil to sprout and reach toward the sunlight, so too must we sometimes endure the darkness of our trials to grow and reach toward the light of divine guidance. I know the deeper you grow your roots, the stronger your grounding and foundation will be. Then if you are ever feeling bare, know flowers will bloom in time, and you will be that much firmer to survive the storms or droughts which will come our way.

I briefly mentioned my baptism when I was 18 years old. While I would like to say the occasion was idyllic, it would be furthest from the truth. You could say my choice was not well received by my family, but those would also be the kinder words to use. They were filled with anger and disappointment, unable to understand or accept my decision. Yet, despite their opposition, I knew in my heart that this was the right path for me. My choice to be baptized was because of them; I wanted my family to be forever. Was it right that I choose to be baptized–I say yes. But did I still face opposition in something that was right? I say a mighty yes. Not all choices and plans we have will be idyllic and easy, even when it is right. Sometimes it will be the harder choice. The thing that takes endurance. The thing that brings us closer to our end goal of everlasting life.

I know before we even took our first breath on this earth, we existed as spirits in the presence of our Heavenly Father. Imagine, if you will, the celestial realm where we dwelled alongside all of our spirit brothers and sisters, including the Savior Himself. Just as in that sacred pre-mortal existence, each of us on this earth is a unique and cherished individual, with a divine nature and a destiny beyond our wildest imagination. Also central to our existence on this earth is the precious gift of agency. Our Heavenly Father entrusts us with the sacred right to choose for ourselves, exercise that agency to learn and grow, and then to chart our course back to Him. While our access to resources, support, or education on this earth may all be different, we are all equal eternal beings, and can find peace and assurance in the knowledge that His plan of salvation is for each of us.

As I reflect on the majesty of the earth and all living things upon it, I cannot help but be moved by the undeniable evidence of God's love and power. I find it is a testimony to the existence of our Heavenly Father and His divine hand in the creation of the world around us. Indeed, as the scripture on the outside of the Science Building reads, “yea, and all things denote there is a God; yea, even the earth, and all things that are upon the face of it, yea, and its motion, yea, and also all the planets which move in their regular form do witness that there is a Supreme Creator.” [4] In every sunrise and sunset, in every starry night sky, we see a reflection of His divine majesty and power. And as we open our hearts to the beauty and wonder of the world around us, we cannot help but be filled with a sense of reverence and gratitude for the One who created it all.

I have always been fascinated with the stars, and maybe if I liked math I would’ve been an astronomer, but I am happy these days to gaze up at the sky from my backyard, marveling at their distant beauty and contemplating the vastness of the universe they represent. There's something humbling about standing under a blanket of stars, each one a distant sun with its own stories and mysteries. Before I end my talk here today, I want to share with you one of my favorite Church videos that speaks directly to my soul and strengthens my testimony no matter how many times I watch it.

[VIDEO: We Lived with God] [5]

We have a divine purpose, and I believe that in moments of doubt and uncertainty, when we question our abilities and worthiness, it is crucial to remember who we truly are—children of a loving Heavenly Father who knows us intimately and believes in our potential. If you were my own children, or if my kids do end up reading this devotional talk one day, this is what I want them to know. We can do hard things, just as I am doing today. Continue to do the right thing, even though I know it doesn’t feel like it when you are in it, as hindsight is 20/20, each trial we face is an opportunity for growth, a chance to deepen our faith and reliance on the Lord. Remember that we are not alone. Our Heavenly Father walks beside us, ever ready to lift us up and carry us through our darkest hours. While the road may be long and difficult, we can take comfort in knowing that with His help, we can overcome any challenge that comes our way.

I know there will be hard days in all our futures, if not happening to you right now. There will be heartbreak, disappointment, grief, and probably some regret. In the depths of our challenges, may we turn to prayer, aligning ourselves with the blessings of God. While the answers may not always come in the way we expect or timeline we desire, I know they come, nonetheless. It is in these moments that we open our hearts and minds to receive His guidance, trusting that He knows what is best for us, even when we cannot see the bigger picture. Remember the moments when you felt His Spirit testify to your soul that you are His, that you are loved beyond measure, and that you have a divine purpose in this life. Hold onto those sacred moments, for they are the roots that will steady you amidst the storms, then reach for the stars, there is no ceiling above our potential, there is always an opportunity to progress.

I am thankful for the gift of faith, and the Atonement that allows me to repent from my shortcomings and poor judgements. I am thankful for my husband who grounds me, my family who keep me humble, friends who encourage and support, and the students here who inspire me. I am thankful to be of and raised in this beautiful place. I cherish my blessings on this earth, and I have hope in eternal life and the promise to be with those I love, in peace, forever. I have trust in Heavenly Fathers plan–I know we are children of God, endowed with divine potential and infinite worth. May you find courage in moments of doubt, strength in times of uncertainty, and peace in the knowledge that you are a beloved child of a loving Heavenly Father, who knows you, who hears you, and who will never forsake you. For therein lies the answer to the question, “How do you know...?” I say to look within your heart and remember the truth that has been whispered to you by a loving Father in Heaven: You are mine, and you are enough.

I say these things, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Notes:
[1] Bible Dictionary, “Prayer”
[2] Jeffrey R. Holland, “Motions of a Hidden Fire,” Liahona, April 2024
[3] Thomas S. Monson, “I Will Not Fail Thee, nor Forsake Thee,” Ensign or Liahona, October 2013, 87
[4] Alma 30:44
[5] We Lived With God (video)