Good morning brothers, sisters, elders, deans, faculty, friends, and family… aloha!
It is a high honor to address you this morning. I want to express profound appreciation for the warm welcome Sister Bassett and I have received since arriving here in early January. Starting a new mission is a challenging process made easier by people like you. I want to thank President and Sister Kauwe for their leadership and gracious manner in which they approach their lives. They are a blessing and credit to this university, their family (past, current, and future), and all who work with them.
I also want to express my appreciation to Erica Glenn for that beautiful arrangement and musical rendition of “Cause of Christ,” a song that means a great deal to me. This choral group took words and notes on a single piece of paper and turned it into a work of art. As a native Texan might say with a local flair… mahalo, ya’ll!
Last month, just a few hundred yards from where I stand, Elder Neil L. Andersen of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles said to the best of my recollection, that if there was anything he hoped for you as the great students at this remarkable university- it would be, he raised his hands and said, "confidence." To the best of my recollection, and while not a direct quote, he spoke of the need to elevate our confidence in our academic endeavors, faith in Christ, and in our futures. You see- this facility, this administration, and the academic staff are here for one reason– you. Without you, this place would be of no use. As such, with that in mind, you have a critical role to play in being here.
Not knowing all the ground rules in preparing for a devotional like this, I wasn’t sure if I was allowed to mention PG-13 rated movie titles. At the risk of running afoul of established protocol, I’ll just say Matt Damon was not in this particular movie of the series. In this movie, as the plot developed, there was a pivotal moment when the leading actress was uncertain if she could perform a difficult assignment – to which the non-Matt Damon character reminded her with great confidence – you belong here. It was this simple reminder that gave her the courage to move forward. And she did.
My friends, if there was a message I would like you to take home today – it would be to have confidence- you belong here.
When I returned to school in my fifties, I was reminded that the university experience had changed from when I was young. My younger classmates were seemingly smarter, more clever, and certainly more adept at technological applications. In so many ways, I felt I didn’t belong. Study carrels gave way to learning pods, textbooks to e-books, libraries to online databases, conference calls to group chats, and in-person classes to online learning experiences. I acquired a big backpack, only to realize a bag not much bigger than my computer would suffice.
I remember my first online class experience—when I answered a question the professor had asked, everyone ignored and talked over me. I was discouraged and embarrassed. Was it my age or my limited credibility? My confidence was shot. It wasn’t until some minutes later I realized I had been on mute the entire time. I unmuted myself, waited my turn to interject, and jumped in to be heard. It wasn’t profound in any way, but at that moment I chose to belong.
Like perhaps some of you, in going back to school I felt woefully inadequate to compete at the high level that was expected of me. I leaned on the worldly philosophies of "fake it til you make it" and even suffered at times with the imposter syndrome. It was in my second year of grad school (where I was affectionately known as “the old guy”) when I had a profound experience that changed me and my confidence level. I was beginning my clinical rotations and had a mock counseling session with a fellow classmate. At first, she played the part of the client in need, but soon the act gave way to heartfelt emotional reveals and vulnerable disclosure that was real, very real- and that needed my full attention. She didn’t mean for the discussion to lead down a difficult and unsettling journey of transparency, but there we were, staring reality in the face. I leaned on my academic learnings, clinical experience, and proven interventions to help this new friend in need. I felt inadequate, unprepared, and completely out of my league. It was then the power of this scripture came to me:
“Let thy bowels also be full of charity towards all men, and to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God, and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distill upon thy soul as the dews from heaven."
"The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means, it shall flow unto thee forever and ever.” 1
At that moment, I needed confidence. I needed to know that I belonged there. I needed guidance from the power of God to distill upon me dews of wisdom from heaven. And He did. In that instant I realized it wasn’t about me- it was about Him and how he wanted to help this young woman who, by professed belief, knew little of Him. Words came to my mouth that led to clinical mending and spiritual healing. After the tears dried and class ended, she reached out to me (she DM’d me) to say that she felt something she had never felt before. I knew what it was- and so do you. Brothers and sisters, because of Him and his majesty, I knew I belonged there!
And so it is with each of us- as we give up on our own fears and worries, and put our lives in His hands, we have no reason to fear. I have heard it said that when we are armed with righteousness and the power of God, He will fill our souls with confidence and wisdom. In this way, He wants us to belong.
Do you belong here at BYU–Hawaii? I don’t know, do you? To get into this university, you had to achieve a certain standard of academic proficiency. You agreed to an honor code that separated you from many of the standards of your peers. Many of you (at great sacrifice) journeyed thousands of miles and left your homes and loved ones. Some of you were thrilled to get away from home, while others miss it even today. You registered for classes, found suitable accommodations, and followed maps to each building to engage in the learning process. When you arrived at your first class, hopefully, your name matched the one on the professor’s list. Do you belong here? If this matched you, then yes.
But how about when you feel afraid, broken, out of place, or even alone.
Paul said to the Corinthians: “…rejoice therefore that I have confidence in you in all things.” 2 He also said to the Hebrews: “Cast not away, therefore, your confidence, which hath great recompense of reward.” 3
In Proverbs 3:5-7, it says to…
"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding."
"In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths." 4
Let’s listen to this video clip on trusting in the Lord:
To find the confidence within, we must remain balanced and centered on him. As Sister Bassett said earlier, no one knows us like him. No one.
As a licensed counselor, I saw far too many clients who had exceptional talents and gifts- both temporal and spiritual-who were kind to all except to one person- themselves. They were particularly skilled at deflecting compliments, downplaying talents, and reveling in their perceived mediocrity. All, while internally absorbing criticism, welcoming or exposing themselves to hate on social media, and overanalyzing personal mistakes. A common theme with many of them was that they lacked confidence. Confidence in self, and the confidence to hold up the power of godliness within.
Remember that by trusting in Him, you can have confidence you are following His path for you, not the path others would have you take.
In Ether, we read: “If men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them." 5
Therein lies the math solution key- if you want to show up in strength, be humble before Him, accept His grace and have faith in Him. I would add that this personal strength yields personal confidence. In my counseling practice, it was sad when those who showed up in strength show out in weakness. Or those that made their strengths become their weakness by their own self-image.
We must want to be great to embrace the greatness within.
Remember- With God, nothing is impossible.
Our beloved prophet, Russell M. Nelson said in the April 2021 General Conference, “As you continue to let God prevail in your life, I know that He is just as optimistic about your future as He has ever been.” 6
My friends, be confident and belong!
And when you are confident and feel a sense of belonging, may I ask a favor- would you then encourage your neighbor to do the same? Isn’t that part of the second great commandment?
President Russell M Nelson also said,
“If you know of anyone who is alone, reach out—even if you feel alone too! You do not need to have a reason or a message or business to transact. Just say hello and show your love. Technology can help you. Pandemic or not, each precious child of God needs to know that he or she is not alone!”
My friends, you are needed- to belong here.
Remember these examples in the scriptures.
Brothers and Sisters, and elders… I testify that Jesus is the Christ, that His majesty is fully manifest in His restored church, That the covenant path leads to Him, and when followed, yields enormous strength and unrelenting confidence. I testify that you are enough, you are more than enough- and that you belong here.
In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.
Notes:
1. D&C 121:45-46
2. 2 Corinthians 7:16
3. Hebrews 10:35
4. Proverbs 3:5-7
5. Ether 12:27
6. What We Are Learning and Will Never Forget, Russell M. Nelson. April 2021 General Conference.