As I have prepared my remarks for you today, I have been inspired by a statement that President Spencer W. Kimball made about this university. He said, [This institution] is designed to enlarge and develop the powers of the spirit and to educate you for eternity. Here you have the privilege of preparing yourself for life’s vocations and at the same time combining theory and practice in preparation for eternal life. Here you prepare to make a living, but more important still, you prepare to live toward perfection, toward exaltation and godhood. (“On My Honor,” Ensign, Apr. 1979, 2)
I have chosen to speak of becoming better disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ. The title of my remarks is Discipleship: In Quest of Victory over Self. I want to define self and discipleship and then give some principles from lessons I have learned in discipleship. My hope is that you will be helped in your understanding and encouraged to take the next step in your discipleship. The first term for definition is “Self.”
Self
Today, as I use the word “Self,” I mean the nature, desires and will of our own hearts. Self includes the natural disposition of the mortal man or woman—whose heart is set upon his or her own interests and concerns, or upon riches, the vain things of the world or worldly cares. President Kimball called these things selfishness. When President Spencer W. Kimball spoke to the youth in Southern California just after he was sustained as the Prophet, he said one thing I will never forget: “Failure in the eternal sense of the word is almost always a result of selfishness.” In my use of the word “Self” today, I also want to also include Pride. President Ezra T. Benson said,
"Pride is the universal sin,…The central feature of pride is enmity—enmity toward God and enmity toward our fellowmen. Enmity means ‘hatred toward, hostility to, or a state of opposition.’ It is the power by which Satan wishes to reign over us. …Pride is essentially competitive in nature. We pit our will against God’s [will]." (“Beware of Pride,” Ensign, May 1989)
In the scriptures, such an attitude and heart is described as hard-hearted, stiff-necked, puffed up, and easily offended. President Benson continued:
"With our fellow men, pride manifests itself in competing with others, making everyone our adversary by pitting our intellect, opinions, works, wealth, talents, or any other worldly measuring device against others. Pride adversely affects all our relationships…. Pride fades our feeling of sonship to God and brotherhood to man…. Pride keeps us from yielding our hearts unto God” (“Beware of Pride,” Ensign, May 1989).
As I use the word “self” I mean selfishness and pride. There are other problems of the heart, but for today I want to just focus upon these two.
President David O. McKay taught that the opposite of self was spirituality. Said he, “Spirituality is the consciousness of victory over self, and of communion with the Infinite” (In Conference Report, Oct. 1969, 8).
Discipleship
As in everything, Jesus modeled perfect discipleship. He was the perfect disciple of His Father. Jesus said, “I do always those things that please [the father]” (John 8:29). Jesus also taught, The Son can do nothing of himself, but what he seeth the Father do: for what things soever he doeth, these also doeth the Son likewise. For the Father loveth the Son, and sheweth him all things that himself doeth. (John 5:19-20)
In the Savior’s instructions to his apostles about discipleship he taught that one must be willing to deny “self.” Jesus said, “If any man will come after me let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me” (Matthew 16:24, emphasis added). From the JST we learn, “And now for a man to take up his cross is to deny himself all ungodliness, and every worldly lust and keep my commandments” (Matthew 16:24 footnote 24d, emphasis added).
Denying one’s self of all ungodliness and every worldly lust has everything to do with how we control the desires, the will, the attitude and inclinations of our hearts. In the motives of our hearts is found the true measure of discipleship. As disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ, each of us must be willing to surrender our heart to the Father. When replacing the law of sacrifice by introducing the sacrament, Jesus emphasized that the new sacrifice was to be our heart. He taught, “And ye shall offer for a sacrifice unto me a broken heart and a contrite spirit.” (3 Nephi 9:20) A broken heart, is the opposite of “self.” A broken heart is one that is humble, meek, or pure and without guile; it is a heart that is submissive to and dependent upon God.
The Savior’s perfect example of discipleship to His Father demonstrated that self must be totally denied. President Ezra T. Benson taught, “Christ removed self as the force in His perfect life. It was not my will but thine be done” (“Cleanse the Inner Vessel” Ensign, May 1986, emphasis added).
Experience with a Principle of Discipleship
In learning lessons about discipleship, I believe that earlier is better. I had an experience at the dedication of the Los Angeles Temple in 1957. I was in the solemn assembly room with the prophets. President Harold B. Lee touched my heart as he was speaking, and said the single most important lesson about discipleship I had learned in my life up until that time. He said, (as best I can remember): “If you want to show your love for God you must first learn to love and serve the people. That is how you show your love to God.”
I had been raised in an inactive LDS home. The real reason why I was at the temple dedication was because I could get out of school for the day. I was not much of a disciple of the Lord then. But that simple lesson about showing our love to God by first loving and serving the people was my guide to all I did in my family, and later, as I became more active in the church, it was the guiding principle in all I did. That one lesson motivated me to make the effort to serve, to be the first one to put down chairs after meetings, or to set up tables, or to clean the church, or to take people to meetings in my car, do my ward or home teaching, etc. I wanted to show my love for God, so I tried to love and serve His people. I hope to leave you with a few lessons today from my own experiences and others that may help as you refine your heart in becoming even a greater disciple of the Lord Jesus Christ.
1. Making Heavenly Father a partner in your education will increase your level of discipleship.
I learned this lesson by two experiences. First, at Junior College. After high school, my father would not let me go on a mission until I had earned an A.A. degree from a college. I was disappointed as my friends left for their missions, but, I knew I needed to obey my father. So I took some “SELF” to college with me. I took a full-load each semester and worked 30+ hours per week. I did what I had to in order to get by. I ended up with 62 credits with a 2.65 GPA. My motive was to “get through those two years” to get on my mission, earn money to pay for my mission and to get two years of college behind me.
I became more educated about discipleship in the mission field, learning that my chief goal in life was to please Heavenly Father first, and to labor to know that the course of life I was pursuing was pleasing to Him.
I learned my second lesson when I returned from my mission. Sister Cole and I married and I started at BYU (Provo) in the fall. I decided that I wanted to become the best servant of the Lord I could be; and then also do something for my career that would be sufficient to sustain my wife and future family. I found that by trying to please Heavenly Father, that I became accountable to Him for how diligently I approached my studies. I also recognized that that accountability to God caused my planning, the scheduling of my time, and my attitude to change, so I could no longer feel good about “just getting by” as I had done previously. As I kept working to make Heavenly Father a full partner in my education, I found I had new vision. For instance, I had never planned to go to graduate school, and yet, in my senior year, I began to have a desire to go to graduate school and applied to three schools. Can you imagine how shocked my parents were when we told them I won a full-ride scholarship for a master’s degree at University of Hawaii’s East-West Center?
The influence of “self” can be found in the attitudes, motives and performance in our educational opportunities. For instance, as I became accountable to Heavenly Father, I found I had to drop certain attitudes like “doing just enough to get by,” and making it look like I really tried hard with my homework; in my speech I pretended to understand using some big words I had learned, and I had to give up on finding good excuses for not doing better, and so on.
President Benson said it this way: “Pride is characterized by ‘What do I want out of life?’ rather than by ‘What would God have me do with my life?’ It is self-will as opposed to God’s will” (“Cleansing the Inner Vessel” Ensign, May 1986). The maturing disciple of Christ, on the other hand, gives his or her allegiance to the Father and the Son, strives to please them first and accounts to them for his or her own motives, attitudes, and in doing one’s best always. These are the same virtues that discipleship demands throughout our entire lives.
2. While preparing to find an eternal companion, devoted discipleship works better than anything else.
We have a very fun-loving daughter, who could sing and dance, and had great personality. She had just started to date a returned missionary and she quite liked him and wanted him to notice her and date her much more often. But truthfully she was a bit intimidated with how good he was. She worried somewhat that she might not be his equal in character and spirituality. She had apparently been thinking of how her girlfriends operated with their boyfriends. One evening, she came to me and said, “Dad, what shall I do?” She had been thinking about how to “catch him.” I simply gave her some principles of being a better disciple of the Lord Jesus Christ. I called her the other day, and she gave me these notes from her journal, which she made that evening we visited.
- First of all you need to have the Holy Ghost to help you and to help him if it is well for each of you to marry each other.
- You need to be as focused upon spirituality as you have ever been in your life.
- Don’t get self-conscious—anything self obstructs the work of the Holy Ghost; think of him and how he can be lifted and complimented (praised). (She was too worried to relax with him).
- The Spirit of the Lord highlights outstanding spiritual good—looking for the best in others and being your best will help you develop the greatest confidence in God as you work with others.
- Don’t try to get him to notice you. Don’t try to “wow” him with your charms.
- Be cheery, kind and charitable. Righteously focus attention to others—not yourself.
- Don’t try to GET him—don’t prostitute the reasons for seeking his attention with SELF—you always want him to righteously notice you if he is inclined. She analyzed her heart, purified her motives, focused upon her discipleship first, and that boy married her in the temple. The point is that she was tempted to do some of the things that were within her personality to do—some of the flare or influence of SELF, but those things were not within the pattern of discipleship of the Savior. Her success in finding an eternal companion came because of discipleship, not the employment of motives driven by SELF.
3. You will make better grades and have a richer education if you worship the Lord on the Sabbath and don’t study.
When I entered BYU Provo in September 1965, Bishop Glenn L. Pearson, a religion professor, was our bishop. Bishop Pearson taught us our first Sunday about the law of the Sabbath, the sacrament, and that our sacrifice to the Lord was to be of a broken heart and a contrite Spirit. He made a promise: “If you look at the Sabbath Day as a day to focus upon the Lord and worship Him, and offer your sacraments and oblations, and not do things for yourself or study—then you will have better grades and a richer education experiences than if you studied on the Sabbath.” I knew I needed help. I decided that each Sabbath I would do the Lord’s will and that I would do all I could to worship the Lord so I could gain the Bishop’s promise of good grades, an enriched education and also have a marked spiritual influence that would stay with me through the week.
I learned something very early in that process. I realized that how I approached the Sabbath—whether on my own terms or from the perspective of the Lord’s commandments—dramatically affected my own vision of discipleship and spirituality. Developing an attitude of worshipping on the Sabbath started to drive my desire to be there on time, to be kind and charitable to all, to be helpful to teachers giving lessons, and, most of all, to seek to connect with Heavenly Father during the time the sacrament was administered. I felt a sense of responsibility to be prepared for Sunday lessons, and to look for ways to do Church service; indeed, I was benefitted greatly by focusing upon worshiping God rather than “attending Church.” I also learned that when one participates in an ordinance—one is exposed to the promises of the powers of heaven—and especially the sacrament where we are promised that we will have the Spirit of the Lord with us ALWAYS.
I had some faith-promoting and enriching educational experiences. One of the most impressive to me came some 8 years later when I had finished my course work for my doctorate. My doctoral chairman, who had been in Europe for the year, learned that I would be leaving the university to take another teaching assignment in California. She called me and asked me to take my comprehensive exams with only ten days’ notice, so I could complete them before I moved. I was greatly troubled by her request. I went to the temple, I visited with each member of my committee, I fasted on both Sundays and studied. When I sat for my four days of comprehensive exams, on several questions I felt like I had answers dictated to me. I truly did receive better grades and a much richer education through Sabbath Day Worship.
The Sabbath Day and Sabbath meetings provide for each of us an opportunity to express the degree of discipleship we desire. Today, the fruit of “Self” in a Sacrament meeting might be to come late, to be worried more who you sit by than where you sit; one might be thinking of hairdos, who is sitting by whom or who is not sitting by whom; how cute he/she looks; texting, reviewing e-mails, doing preparation for your upcoming lesson (for the next hour or two); reading some homework assignment or writing a letter, etc. I have a testimony that the motives of our hearts regarding Sabbath worship reflect our degree of discipleship. I know that effective Sabbath Day worship of the Savior allows us to participate in receiving faith-fortifying, forgiving, purifying and succoring powers of the atonement.
4. Most correction and reproof from leaders of the Church are really invitations to eliminate self from the motives of our hearts and increase our discipleship. While I am embarrassed by this example, it remains as one of the greatest lessons I have ever learned about discipleship. By the time I was 33 years old, I had my doctorate, I was teaching in the Institute of Religion program, I had been an elders' quorum president for a couple of years and as I looked about me, to see if I was doing o.k. in the Church and in my profession, I felt that I was o.k.
I was surprised, but pleased to be called by the stake president to serve on the high council. I was living in Fullerton, California. Our stake took in three cities and had 12 units. At the first high council meeting, I sat in the 20th chair. We had 12 high councilors and 8 alternate high councilors. I was intimated as I observed the group of men—most had some grey hair, some had silver hair and a few had no hair. During the meeting the stake presidency was discussing the need to call a person to be the stake mission president, who would also be the president of the Stake Seventies quorum. I was too uncomfortable to say a word out loud, but I said to my friend on my right: “I think Brother Smith would make a great Stake Mission President—he served as my counselor for a year, then became ward Seventy group leader, and the first year our baptisms doubled; the next year the baptisms doubled again. Brother Smith was a convert and he really works well with people.” The person on my right said nothing to the group, so I determined I had a bad idea.
The next evening after work was over, I dropped by the stake center to pick up my mail. The stake president was there and asked me to visit with him. He told me that a colleague of mine on the high council had reported to him about my remarks to him. The Stake President had interpreted my colleague’s remarks to him—“Brother Cole said if he were the high councilor over missionary work, and Brother Smith was Stake Mission President, that Brother Cole knew that Brother Smith would do just as Brother Cole told him.” As I started to speak and say, that is not what I said—the spirit of the Lord said firmly to me, “Sit down and don’t say anything.” I was shocked that I had such a strong message come to me. Then for the next 20 or so minutes my stake president reproved me for my pride, told me that of all people he knew, I should be the last person to have pride in my heart because I stood in front of the youth of the Church teaching religion to them daily. About half way through, I thought to myself, “this is not fair, I didn’t even say those things” and the Holy Ghost again firmly instructed that I should say nothing. I was devastated. I was hurt. I felt misunderstood and mistaken. Finally, I left.
As I drove home, I was in tears. I wondered “Why was I told to say nothing? I didn’t even say those things.”
When I arrived at home, my wife took one look at me and said, “What is wrong?” I said, “Charlene, I need you to come with me for a moment”—I took her into the bedroom and said, “I want you to answer my question with either a yes or no.” I still remember her looking into my eyes, when I asked her, “Do you think I am proud?” She sweetly said: “yes.” It was like a dagger to my heart.
I began that night at 10:00 after our couple prayer to study the Doctrine and Covenants Commentary. I knew there were examples in Church History where some men were rejected for their pride. I thought, “I better learn what pride is; I also better learn what the principles of meekness, humility and submissiveness are.” For the next 13 months I missed only a few nights, as I studied sometimes until 2:00 a.m. trying to fully understand the underlying motives of pride and the way it was manifested in people’s lives, and how the Lord taught the brethren how to overcome pride. I truly did not understand the nature of pride. In those quiet hours for 13 months with a great hunger on my part and tender experiences in reading and studying verse upon verse, personality flaw upon personality flaw, I finally began to comprehend the pervasiveness of pride, and how Satan’s attacks to our hearts are often discovered in the motives for which we do things. During this time I fasted nearly each Sunday to hasten my divine tutorial. I learned that discipleship is the opposite of pride and selfishness. I learned of many motives in my heart that I hadn’t recognized that needed to be refined and repented of.
I have ever been grateful to a wonderful, loving stake president who took the opportunity to teach a young man about discipleship. It has been my experience throughout my life that most often when I have been corrected or reproved by a priesthood leader—or whenever I have been the one offering reproof or correction—that the focus is usually on the purifying of the motives of our hearts so we can be greater disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ.
5. When in the employ of prophets, let your assignments for them be consecrated; let their decisions become guidelines for your discipleship of the Master.
I spent the last 18 years of my career in the Headquarters of the Church Educational System in Salt Lake City. I learned something from working with the prophets, their chosen administrators in CES programs and the General Authorities. I recognized that those of us working in any aspect of the Church Educational System are employees of the prophets. Our incomes are from the sacred funds of the Church. As faculty and staff (including volunteers and missionaries) at this university, we are in the employ of the prophets.I have seen that it is inevitable that changes will occur in our CES organizations. My experience has been that before much strategic change is made, the prophets and their chosen administrators will often ask members of the faculty and staff for study, counsel and to make recommendations. I have seen over the years that the prophets usually expect such work to be consecrated—given with the best we can—but given to them. No ownership. No salesmanship—just consecrated labor. But once decisions are made and approved by prophets, there is no such thing as loyal opposition in the employ of prophets. Once decisions are made, the test of loyalty, indeed, the true test of our discipleship is found in how much we make their decisions our own will and our own desires. When we see doing the will of the prophets as a measure of our discipleship, we may have to jettison, sometimes, attitude, or inclination towards persuasion, or self-concerns, or to drop our resistance to a particularly favorite position we once held. It is my firm belief that the vision that the Brethren have for this university will never be fulfilled unless we are one in heart, mind and mouth. I feel certain some of us may have had, and will yet have, divine tutorials in this tender matter.
We come now to the point in our visit when I would like to give you some encouragement in taking the next step in your own quest of victory over self and the development of your own discipleship of our Lord and Savior. Elder Neal A. Maxwell said: “Discipleship is being fully consecrated to the Father’s will.” (A Disciple's Life: The Biography of Neal A. Maxwell, 544). The greatest influence, teacher and impetus we will every have to guide us in our path towards consecrated discipleship is the Holy Ghost. Discipleship will lead us to develop the divine nature—meaning the nature or character of Jesus and His Father. Besides the Holy Ghost teaching us, we also have the guidelines of our ordinances and covenants which are the means to achieve the divine nature.
President Howard Hunter taught, “The ordinances and covenants are the means to achieving that divine nature that will return us into [God’s] presence again” (closing remarks, regional representatives’ seminar, 3 Apr. 1987). As you pursue your academic and vocational education, please remember that the greatest goal is your preparation for eternal life. Also please remember that you have your agency; you are the only one responsible for the desires of your heart, the refinement of your will and the motives of your soul. You are the steward of your discipleship of the Master. Each of us is at a different location along that path towards developing the divine nature. But we can each take the next step to improve our discipleship by overcoming self.
I was in a meeting once where (at the time) Elder Henry B. Eyring taught that the best way to make improvement is to focus upon the things you are already doing and to do them better. My encouragement for each of us today is to do just a little better in the practices we have already established. I suggest that for our target we sharpen our accountability to Heavenly Father. Bring the reality to your mind and heart daily that Heavenly Father knows our thoughts and the intents of our hearts. (See Alma 12:7). Heavenly Father knows our motives, our attitudes, our goals, our desires, our will and our efforts. I have found that in personally accounting to Heavenly Father my goals are made clear, my motives are refined, my “self” is seen in contrast to discipleship, my heart is made more pure. In accounting to Heavenly Father, truth always prevails and the Holy Spirit seems to be the relentless educator. I have found that there are three practices that are common to most all of us, wherein we can connect with Our Heavenly Father and have more focused accountability. These practices are:
- Study the Word of God;
- Humble Prayer; and
- Worship on the Sabbath
1. Study the Word of God.
I imagine most all of us do some study of the word of God. But while reading and studying, and pondering, please consider looking for insights, principles and greater understanding of faithful discipleship as you study for the next season of time. The Holy Ghost is the perfect teacher. I have found that you can read the same book of scripture over and over and with each successive reading, the insights, principles and teachings seem to come out of obscurity and darkness to my understanding through the teaching of the Holy Ghost. I have found that learning and understanding about discipleship is incremental: we only get what we can understand at the time.
2. Humble Prayer.
After we are in the attitude of accounting to Heavenly Father for our will, our desires, our attitudes, our motives and purity of heart—that is, our discipleship to the Master, we will have great incentive to keep trying no matter how long it may be or how difficult for us to improve in 10 matters of the heart. I have found that study of the scriptures and the words of the prophets helps draw the heavens closer, so when I pray there is usually a connection and with every connection with the Spirit I am encouraged; sometimes with correction, sometimes with peace, but usually with enlightening insights and always with greater faith.
3. Worship the Lord on the Sabbath and maximize the power in the Sacrament Ordinance.
We all go to church on the Sabbath day. Let’s decide to be more effective in our worship. Speaking of the cleansing power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ available through worthily participating in the ordinance of the sacrament, Elder Dallin H. Oaks taught, We are commanded to repent of our sins and come to the Lord with a broken heart and a contrite spirit and partake of the sacrament. In the partaking of the bread, we witness that we are willing to take upon us the name of Jesus Christ and always remember Him and keep His commandments. When we comply with this covenant, the Lord renews the cleansing effect of our baptism. We are made clean and can always His Spirit to be with us. (“Special Witnesses of Christ,” Ensign, Apr. 2001, 13; see also “Arms of Safety,” Ensign, Nov. 2008, 20) Through appropriate Sabbath worship and worthily participating in the sacrament Ordinance, we can, as Elder Oaks said, qualify to receive the cleansing power of the Atonement. (See “Arms of Safety,” Ensign, Nov. 2008, 20). The Spirit of the Lord, which we are promised will always be with us—not only cleanses us, or “renews the cleansing effect of our baptism,” but it is also the means by which our hearts can be purified and the grasp of SELF be eliminated. Let’s maximize the potential of our participation in the sacrament ordinance as the time where we put discipleship on the line and ask for tutoring of The Spirit of the Lord to our broken hearts and contrite spirits. Such worshipful participation in the ordinance of the Sabbath will maximize the influence of the gift of the Holy Ghost during the rest of the week and that Spirit will also bring peace, confidence, and depth of character and fill our souls with desires and the will to be more like Christ.
That we may do better in each of these practices that we have already placed into our lives, and that we may strive more to overcome self in the development of consecrated discipleship, I humbly pray in the sacred name of our Exemplar and Savior, Jesus Christ, amen.