Brilliant Inventions
President Wheelwright and I have 18 adorable grandchildren, with one on the way, and each is a source of great delight to us. Of course they're all unique and talented but there seems to be about one per family that arrives with the "invention" bug, and they've come up with some pretty clever things!
Rachel is nine years old. When her older sister left for college, she begged her parents to turn her vacated room into a science lab to use for experiments and inventions. Though her parents refused, that didn't stop Rachel from inventing the Snazzy Page Turner to help her hold her music in place as she practices the piano.
Steele is eight years old. He recently took a bad fall while sledding, resulting in scrapes and bruises all over. During his convalescence he came up with this solution: He calls it the RareTip. Pretty ingenious! Luckily, he has a willing and capable dad to help with his big ideas.
Ben is four years old. Ben introduces himself to strangers by announcing, "My name is Ben and I'm an inventor!" Ben's favorite tools are twist ties, toilet paper rolls, and Elmer's glue. He recently asked his mother if she would please buy an emergency supply of 129 bottles of glue, so he would never run out. One of his bigger creations of late was an airplane that filled much of the garage, using every piece of scrap wood he could find, and more than a little glue.
As you might have realized by now, there's a fairly wide range of usefulness, not to mention safety, among these inventions. Some, though currently in prototype form, might actually prove helpful, like Rachel's Snazzy Page Turner or Steele's RareTip; others, like Ben's airplane, might be more of a liability than an asset, I'm afraid!
Life is a lot like that, isn't it? There are things we use, inventions, if you will, that make our lives easier, and other things we use that might actually make our lives harder. In fact, you may know certain people who just seem to have a gift for simplifying their lives, while others have a real knack for complicating things.
What's the difference? What is your friend who is always on time, always neatly groomed, and always remembering birthdays doing differently than your neighbor who seems to be perpetually "a day late and a dollar short?" What's the secret?
A Riddle
I have a theory about that secret of success, and that's what I'd like to share with you today. Let's start with a "Who am I" riddle.
I am your constant companion, like it or not.
I may be your greatest helper or your heaviest burden.
I will push you forward or drag you down
but I am completely at your command.
I am the servant of great men and the master of failures.
Take me, train me, be firm with me,
and I will put the world at your feet.
Be easy with me, and I will destroy you.
Who am I?
Well, some of you sleuths may have deduced that this riddle personifies HABIT. As we all know, our habits can be much like my grandchildren's inventions:helpful or harmful, practical or painful.
So what is a habit, exactly? Well, physiologically speaking, when we perform any action repeatedly, our brains actually create new neurological pathways in order to make executing that routine more efficient. The formation and use of those pathways are what constitute habit. So habits exist to conserve energy, both physical and mental. We can think of them as hardened ruts in a once-muddy country road; it's much easier to drive in the ruts than it is to drive across them; in fact, it's almost effortless.
Habits are much more prevalent in our daily lives than we might realize. Scientists estimate that anywhere from 50 to 90% of our everyday behavior is based on habit! If this is true then it's likely that the only way to effect real change in our lives is to change our habits. Deep down, I think we all know this, whether we want to admit it or not. Habits are huge! Over 2000 years ago, Ovid declared, "Nothing is more powerful than habit."
We can consider our habits to be like our own personal inventions, some of which are more useful than others. In order to live up to our potential, we need to take steps to manage our habits, rather than allowing our habits to manage us.
Agency
Through the gospel, we know it's possible for us to gain this sort of control over our bodies; in fact, it's one of the main reasons we are here on Earth. We often discuss the importance of agency, and it certainly applies to the study of habit. Elder Delbert L. Stapley recognized,
"We are not born into this world with fixed habits. Neither do we inherit a noble character. Instead, as children of God, we are given the privilege and opportunity of choosing which way of life we will follow:which habits we will form."
So agency is as critical to our success as habit; in fact, agency is the one condition required for personal growth.
Doctrine and Covenants section 58, verses 27 and 28 reads,
"Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness; for the power is in them, wherefore they are agents unto themselves."
The power of personal agency is one of the core doctrines underlying the Plan of Salvation. In an excellent devotional given in 2009 at BYU-Idaho, Vice President Clark Gilbert summed up agency beautifully:
"It is our agency that made us who we are,and it is the use of our agency that will shape who we become."
Or, like Elder Stapley put it, the habits we choose to form are, in reality, forming our character, be it noble or not.
Living with Intention
Remember I told you that I have a theory about the secret of success. Obviously, it has to do with habits but the real "secret" isn't figuring out what habits will make you successful; I think you already know that. The trick is in knowing how to consistently do those things that you know will make you successful, or in other words, knowing how to form those habits. It's all about intentionally establishing habits and routines that will guarantee your success. The true hallmark of ALL successful people is consistent, purposeful action, and it's within all of our reach. It's what I call "living with intention."
Living with intention requires us to do some self-examination. Like an old Spanish proverb says, "Self-knowledge is the beginning of self-improvement." So we'll need to start living intentionally by considering our current habits, both bad and good. This isn't as easy as it sounds! Mark Twain quipped, "Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits." Like the mote and the beam we read about in the Bible, it's often easier to see our brother's flaws more clearly than our own. But, whether we want to figure it out on our own or ask for someone else's opinion, we need to identify those habits we wish to change, replace, improve, or develop.
Bad Habits
For the sake of getting it over with, let's first consider bad habits. The Book of Mormon offers us some encouraging words on this discouraging topic:
"And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them."
So with humility and faith we can overcome those habits that are holding us back and keeping us from reaching our potential, from developing a "noble character." Some of these bad habits might be very obvious, like struggling with a certain element of the Word of Wisdom or the Honor Code. Some are less obvious but equally dangerous, like allowing the seductive snares of popular media and entertainment to weaken our agency. Still other poor habits are a question of degree, like joining the growing crowd of "social media slaves" who feel compelled to tweet, text, and Facebook constantly, opening the door of your mind to endless distractions and robbing you of your precious ability to focus.
As you are well aware, and as these examples illustrate, some habits are clearly black and white, obviously needing change, but others come in various shades of gray, and those might be a little harder to recognize. Furthermore, admitting where we require change is complicated by the fact that many of these "gray-area habits" seem to form subconsciously, filling a void in our time or activity without our even realizing it, or they may form out of complacency or apathy, because we "choose not to choose."
Self-Imposed Limitations
It may help us to consider these "gray-area habits" more as self-imposed limitations, rather than outright acts of evil.
Have you ever been to the zoo or the circus and seen a huge elephant tethered to a tiny stake? Why doesn't the enormous beast just muscle his way free? From the time that elephant was a relatively small baby, his trainer tied him up like that. Early on, the stake actually was stronger than the elephant but by the time the elephant's strength surpassed the stake's, he had stopped trying, figuring that his limiting situation was "just the way it is."
Might we have similar poor habits in our lives that we are so accustomed to that we figure "that's just the way it is?" Let's take to heart Lehi's counsel to his rebellious sons to "shake off the chains with which [they were] bound."
Elder Marvin J. Ashton spoke of these chains and their self-imposed limitations:
"Who among us hasn't felt the chains of bad habits? . . . So many of us tend to say, 'This is the way I am. I can't change.' . . . Lehi warned his sons to 'shake off the chains' because he knew that chains restrict our mobility, growth, and happiness. . . . Many of us today are shackled by the restrictive chains of poor habits. We are bound by inferior self-images created by misconduct and indifference."
Practiced Discipline
Whether we're talking about breaking old habits or forming new ones, living with intention requires great effort. Unfortunately, "positive habits are as difficult to make as negative habits are difficult to break."
It doesn't seem fair that bad habits often form subconsciously, with hardly any effort on our part, but good habits require so much work! Forming good habits takes intentional desire, repetition, and patience. We might call this self-mastery; social scientists have termed this practiced discipline, and they would define it as the ability to purposefully create habits. I really like that phrase, "practiced discipline," because it plainly reminds us what is required to actually master our selves: Discipline and practice, and it's a non-stop job!
Teddy Roosevelt is generally considered a master of practiced discipline and living with intention. As a child, he suffered frequent ailments, including severe asthma, poor eyesight, and extreme frailty. His parents wondered if he would survive childhood. But Teddy forged himself into an incredibly strong man, physically and mentally. Before his presidency, he was a Rough Rider in the Spanish-American War; later, while campaigning, he was shot in the chest but gave a 90-minute speech before going to the hospital! He went on to author more than thirty books, establish the National Park system and the National Forest Service, and eventually adventured in Africa, hunting big game to be displayed at the Smithsonian and Natural History museums.
Of his practiced discipline, Teddy once explained, "I had to train myself painfully and laboriously not merely as regards my body but as regards my soul and spirit." Historian Elting Morison agreed, writing, "The energies and talents he possessed were not placed at birth in some natural harmony; they were through the passing years organized and directed by a sustained and splendid act of will."
Wouldn't we all love to find that sustained and splendid act of will? What a wonderful way Mr. Morison phrased what's required to conquer our bad habits and replace them with good ones:"a sustained and splendid act of will."
I think King Benjamin must have had some inspired understanding, as well, of that "sustained and splendid act of will." In Mosiah 3:19 we read:
"For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a little child doth submit to his father."
So self-mastery, or mastering our habits, is really all about conquering the Natural Man. While scientists know that self-mastery requires practice and discipline, saints know that self-mastery is much more attainable if we also have faith, the gift of the Holy Ghost, and an understanding of the Atonement.
Habits Worth Forming
This rightly leads us to the conclusion that some of the best Good Habits we could form are:
" those that increase our faith,
" those that help us listen to, understand, and act on the promptings of the Spirit,
" and those that internalize our understanding and acceptance of the Atonement.
Each of you in this audience can probably rattle off a list of all those "Primary Answers" that would constitute such habits: Say your prayers morning and night, read your scriptures every day, go to church on Sundays and the temple frequently, pay a full tithe, etc., etc. These basics really are the best Good Habits we can form! They are specific, tangible, and measurable, and that makes them quite attainable. And because of their foundational simplicity, they can have mighty consequences.
Jack Hodge, a researcher in the field of habit formation, says,
"Specific consequences of specific habits result in broader, more general habits with broader, more significant consequences,"
and that's the beauty of these "Primary Answers." Just recently, the Primary General President, Sister Rosemary M. Wixom, summed up the wisdom in starting with these basic habits by saying, in essence,
"Making good choices puts us on a path to making more good choices."
Remember, "By small and simple things are great things brought to pass."
But How?
Still, with all the simplicity of these "Primary Answers," each of us often struggles, at one time or another, with internalizing these basics as solid habits, so I want to elaborate on three generally accepted keys to forming new habits while sharing with you some practical tips for making them become a permanent, powerful part of your life. Those keys are consistency, reward, and motivation.
Consistency
The secret to consistency is to have a plan. That's at the very core of living with intention! The renowned basketball coach, John Wooden, famously said,
"Failing to plan is planning to fail,"
and research shows that's true. People who set goals are more successful than those who don't. So the first part of your plan should include writing down the habit you hope to instill. This serves both as a tangible reminder and as a way to track your progress.
Another important part of your plan might be to tell someone about the new habit you are forming. This creates some accountability as you allow someone else to check up on you.
A third tip for making your plan is to "link" a new habit to an already established one, such as refusing to make or unmake your bed until you've knelt in personal prayer. Now this works for a devoted bedmaker -- some of you might be better off linking your personal prayers to brushing your teeth, something you might do more consistently than making your bed! Similarly, you could link reading your scriptures to eating your breakfast. If you're not a breakfast fan, you might choose to hold off on checking Facebook until you've completed your daily study. You get the idea:linking a new habit to an already established one can help you be consistent.
Rewards
Rewarding yourself for progress with your new habit can also be a powerful tool to help you succeed. We've all heard of sporting streaks, like Joe DiMaggio's 56 consecutive baseball games with a hit; good habits can be helped along by rewarding streaks, like allowing yourself your favorite candy bar every ten days straight that you say your prayers. Negative consequences might also be helpful in your personal training, such as skipping your favorite show if you skip church. Good habit forming might necessitate a little discomfort at times. Self-mastery, or practiced discipline, requires us to be both the sculptor and the marble of our personal masterpiece, so sometimes we'll feel the chisel.
Motivation
Finally, motivation is the ultimate key to adopting new habits, and this will be easy if we allow those very things we are striving for to be our greatest helpers or motivators: That is, our faith, the Spirit, and the Atonement. This kind of motivation creates a divine upward spiral: The more we strengthen our faith through righteous habits like personal prayer, the more faith we have to encourage that very habit. The more we learn to recognize the still, small voice as we study our scriptures, the stronger our desire to study our scriptures regularly, even feasting on the good word of God. And the more we come to understand the power of the Atonement as we attend our church meetings and visit the temple, the more we avail ourselves of those sacred, learning opportunities.
When we understand the "why," the "how" becomes so much easier. As President Uchtdorf explained:
"While understanding the 'what' and the 'how' of the gospel is necessary, the eternal fire and majesty of the gospel springs from the 'why.' When we understand why our Heavenly Father has given us this pattern for living, when we remember why we committed to making it a foundational part of our lives, the gospel ceases to become a burden and, instead, becomes a joy and a delight. It becomes precious and sweet."
Conclusion
Well, I began with a riddle, so I think I'll end with one, too.
Five birds sat in a tree.
Three decided to fly away.
How many were left?
Well, five because deciding to fly away is not the same thing as actually flying away. If we leave here today merely having decided to change our habits, we will be no better off than when we arrived. Not until we actually take tangible, measurable steps, like flapping our wings, will we begin to make progress. Like Elder Ashton said,
"A declaration will never break chains.
It requires commitment, self-discipline, and work."
If we are to facilitate real, powerful change, we must fully engage and live life with intention, like we mean it, starting today! To see change, we'll have to get moving and make something happen. After all, when you see a man on top of a mountain, you can bet he didn't fall there.
Start by thinking big but starting small. Think about those motivators:our faith, the gift of the Holy Ghost, and our Savior and His atoning sacrifice. If we understand the "why" of those Primary Answers, it is so much easier to maintain an upward slope toward eternity, which is what matters to the Lord. Again from President Uchtdorf,
"The 'what' and 'how' of obedience mark the way and keep us on the right path. The 'why' of obedience sanctifies our actions, transforming the mundane into the majestic. It magnifies our small acts of obedience into holy acts of consecration."
The good habits we form, which are often small acts of obedience, become majestic because of their transformational power.
Living with intention requires conquering the natural man and seeking to become a saint. Living with intention requires that each one of us invent new and improved habits, beginning today, that will help us with our challenges and guarantee our success. Living with intention means actively seeking for that which is best, every single day of our lives, actively seeking for that which will bring us peace and happiness and eternal life, even when it's hard.
I close with these words from Nephi:
"...He that diligently seeketh shall find; and the mysteries of God shall be unfolded unto them..."
I know with all my heart that these things are true, that we can change, that we can form noble characters and reach our greatest potential, and we can begin today. I leave these thoughts with you, along with my prayers for your success, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.